Sunday, September 5, 2010

From The Inside

I had a tough week - lots of crying in front of people I don't normally feel comfortable crying in front of. It is as if the unfairness of it all caught up with me and I felt the right for a bit of a pity party. I think it has been a long time coming, and I just needed to cry a bit and say, "This isn't fair!"

That said, after all my self-boo-hoos, a friend said, "Maybe God is allowing you to be poor because you are about to minister to the poor?"

Light bulb...epiphany!

God said, 'Yes! Are you getting it now?"

And I know, God does not ask all his children to experience poverty before they can minister to those in poverty. But, for some reason, He needed to change me...from the inside. I had the chance to talk with Joe about this and we agreed that we now can look a woman applying for free lunches at school in the eye and say, "I know how this feels."

We can now look at the mom worried about her sick child because she doesn't have good insurance and say, "I know how this feels."

We can now join in a conversation about how hard it is to "get ahead" once you've been knocked down.

And we can say, "Yes, we have next to nothing...but what brings us contentment and peace is knowing our Lord and Savior." We will not show up downtown in fancy cars or with expensive purses...we will show up with old jeans and used shoes. We will not sit down to a free dinner and turn up our noses...we will sit down and enjoy the feast. God has truly changed us, from the inside.

The pity-party is over! We have what we need - and God always finds a way to bring a little blessing (thanks Mom and Dad!) just when we need it. I feel a little more equipped for the mission at hand. And that is a good thing.

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