Monday, August 30, 2010

Re-Name the Blog

I am looking for a cool new name for my blog. Joe and I talked on the phone today and he agreed, it is time the blog became much more than an adoption story. George has truly become one or our own...annoys us and delights us just as much as the other kiddos. This story has taken a turn...

it's not so much about adoption anymore...

but about radical lives....

and right now, God is saying "no" to adoption...

and I'm OK with that.

So, we start a new journey, and so I want to change the blog (new design - but hey, I did that every few months anyway!) I think this is going to become more about Joe and I...and this crazy life God is leading us to.

We are hurting...the business is limping on, but barely alive. We don't know how we are going to make it through the winter. The world says, "Get a job" to me. And I even took steps toward that. But then Joe and I prayed....and God said, "Trust me."

At church yesterday, God told me, "I've got this in my hands."

But we are so scared. I have to talk to my children daily about not being able to get all the supplies on the list, or how hand-me-downs are really cool, or how yes, we have another repair to do on our old car. I have seen my children crack...all in their own time about how we live now. Eleanor and Harry accepted it a while ago. Isabel and George are going through it now. They are stomping around the house pouting about everything. They well, "I want more stuff!" Well, they don't say stuff - but you can insert any thing you life. No lie, George stomped around the yard today yelling, "I want Legos!" Isabel stomped up the stairs telling me, "Everyone I know gets everything they want!" Really?

Maybe Lincoln will never go through this, because this is all he has really known.

Joe is discouraged, and daily I find myself trying my best to be his encourager and supporter.

We just don't understand the path we are on. Sometimes I think God is just intentionally keeping us humble. Perfect example is Sunday...the pastor mentioned Safe Families in his sermon! I was praising God and so happy. And then, I get into my car to make the 45 minute drive home, and my gas tank is a hair away from orange. For this car, orange means running out of gas. It has happened twice now! So, the entire way home, the kids and I are praying. And then we are planning, "OK - if we make it so far, we can walk home and wait for Dad to get home to bring gas over. If we don't make it that far, we'll sit in the car and open up windows and we all have our Bibles, so we can read and wait until Dad gets home." We made it home. Humbled.

And then, I get a phone call from someone in Safe Families - she encourages me and brings hope back. Joe and I talk all afternoon about Safe Families.

And business on Monday.

It's a horrible roller-coaster we are on. How do we find that spot of being totally in-trust with God? I admit, I'm not there yet! It someone is there, please tell me how to totally trust God!

But as I write this, my daughters are asleep in their bedroom, Harry is asleep peacefully in his room, Joe is resting and falling asleep in our room, and the two little boys are snoring away as they listen to Christian music and glow in the light of a safari scene for a nightlight. Even Gunnar is sound asleep at my feet. Peace. Contentment. We prayed together. We hugged and kissed and said goodnight. So, what am I so worried about?

If you have an idea for a new blog name - please comment!


Jamie said...

I start thinking of possible blog names...It's amazing how life can bring such ups and downs and yet have all end as it should... We love you guys!

Ann Marie said...

"The Business of Being a Radical Mom" :)

~Alicia said...

Or The Business of Being a Radical Family

I love taking blogs for a new turn or twist for that season of life. That's what keeps them fun for us as writers and draws in different readers which gives us opportunities to meet others we may not have met!